MID-WEEK

09:05

Pursed lips, gathered brows, glinting eyes, tense shoulders, flaring nostrils…. She took a step back from the girl staring at her in the mirror. The girl was tense, angry, and ready to jump the next person to say or do the wrong thing. She leaned towards the sink, rested her hands against it and closed her eyes to the image in the mirror. She took a deep breath, searched deep inside hereself; she was seeking her happy place. Five unsuccessful attempts, three knocks on the toilet door, and a hysterical laugh after, she settled for the next best thing- the emotional control to keep it all in.

It was not Tola’s fault though. The day had gone from planned and perfect to chaotic… caused by external forces she had had no control over. She had woken early, made the meal, taken her a.m water therapy, even her a.m smoothie. What she had not expected was crawling drivers making her two minutes late. She had gotten to work late by two minutes. Two minutes! 160 frigging seconds!!! The incredulity of it was just so annoying that she had wanted to scream at someone. But she had smiled at the gatemen and signed her name on the register with her usual flourish.

11:30

“This is a work place! You can’t be coming late like it’s your family meeting”

The obese admin officer really shouldn’t have said that hands akimbo. In fact, she shouldn’t have said it all. And she sure as hell shouldn’t have placed her hands akimbo.

She can’t possibly look like an amoeba. Perhaps if I look at her from the right angle she could look like a trapezium. Tola tuned the admin giant out; bent her neck to the right. She frowned, muttered something hushed, sat up straight, then bent her neck to the left.

Sometime during her neck-twisting she noticed the admin giant had stopped talking, but she was too busy trying to make the woman look like a ‘recognised shape’ to bother.

“Oh well, guess she’s amoeba adminus

Mrs. Johnson heard that, saw the comic expression on Tola’s face and felt righteous indignation. Annoyed, she raised her voice two pitches higher to shout at Tola. Tola looked up, and lost it. Finally she had found her happy place. In the heaving bossoms of Mrs. Johnson; newly aliased amoeba adminus.

Her buttons are going to pop… or perhaps her bras would collapse from the exertion of holding amoeba adminus’s panting heavy boobs

She tried to hold on to the laughter bubbling somewhere in her stomach. She really tried. But amoeba adminus must have sensed it somehow, because the enraged woman picked something from her desk and threw it in Tola’s direction. Tola ducked, then looked up just in time to see amoeba adminus get even more so as her face crumpled into twists of what looked like scrunched paper… just before large drops of tears rolled down her face. That was when Tola lost the battle and started laughing. She looked behind her to see what had caused amoeba adminus’ tears and saw the woman’s Iphone 6 in pieces on the floor.

Oooh… karma is a bitch. Fancy her throwing her phone at me.

She clutched her stomach as she laughed, thinking: even shattered the iPhone looks more ‘put together’ than its owner.

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